The 10 Rap Commandments

So Im on Twitter, I say "Fuck 2Pac" and the world ends. So Im inspired to create a list of Rap Commandments

1) 2Pac Is The Best Rapper Ever (though I disagree, it seems that its true)
2) Jay-Z Is The Best Rapper Alive (also I disagree, it seems muhfuckas love this guy, despite he's never been that amazing)
3) You Gotta Sell Crack (even if you didnt, you have to say you did)
4) You Have To Be "Hard" (people dont like rappers who rap about everyday things, oh no, everyday you have to commit crimes and shoot and kill people)
5) Dr Dre Is The Greatest Producer (despite The Chronic being nothing but Parliment-Funkadelic loops)
6) You Have To Have Swag (Unless you look borderline homosexual, you dont have swag, you need colorful shoes clothes and neckerchiefs)
7) Your Life Has To Revolve Around The Club (yes, everytime you must go to the club, pop bottles and leave with a girl, despite real girls never leave the club with someone)
8) You Have To Be Rich As Fuck (it seems like every rapper has enough money for maybachs and ice, which means Maybachs are the price of Kia's and I should own one)
9) You Have To Be Real (whatever that means, clearly my definition and the worlds definition of real is far different from that of a rappers)
10) Cant Love (Who gives a fuck if thats ya babys mama, so what yal been married for 10 years, you dont love them hoes)

Baptism By Fire

So Im gearing up work on my next mixtape "Baptism By Fire". And its going to be more of the stuff that was on "Before I Embarass Myself" except with absolutely nothing amusing lighthearted or humorous on it. Im feeling aggressive, I feel like being dark. I already have a tracklist compiled, for these songs have all been written. Time to lay them down. Heres the tracklist:

1) Wildflower 4
2) Conteplating Homicide
3) Life's Unfair
4) D.O.R. (Death Of Romance)
5) Day to Night
6) Kiss Of Death
7) Twisted
8) Bang!
9) Baby, Im A Star
10) Champagne Supernova
11) Emotionless
12) Treason
13) When The Music Stops
14) Catch Me
15) Baptism By Fire

ITs short, may get longer, but this is the foundation. Some things will be addressed,so stay tuned.

As far as Before I Embarass Myself, its coming soon, Im working on getting distribution.

The Final Solution

Right now, again, I feel myself like the 05 Eminem, you know burnt out on rap, minus the drugs though. My mom is sick, I hate my job, and Im walking solo in this game called life. I finished Before I Embarass Myself, but have yet to release it. Mainly because I know itll finally be my arrival. Its my 7th mixtape, and after 5 mixtapes of trial and error, I feel "Reckless Abandon" showed that this Mike Game guy not only could rhyme his ass off, he was starting to fill those shoes. Then Before I Embarass Myself showed the kind of range most MC's not only in my city, but in hip hop in general lack. And Im convinced I cant top it. Mainly because I started on the Bang Bus cd, which is basically audio pr0n. I wanted something easy to work on, because essentially, I cant stop rapping. But I couldnt go into a new mixtape, because my heart is hurting right now, and I dont want to do two mixtapes about the same exact thing, ie the failures that are my relationships. And I dont know what happened, but I pretty much have a bout 10 new tracks written in my head, this morning. I dont know, I woke up depressed, had some stuff on my mind. And I guess we could call it "freestyling", but the way theyre structured in my head is insane. Its like my mind was plugged in as I slept and just downloaded these verses into my head. And as far as my Illprint family is concerned, fuck, we had all the energy in the world a month and a half ago. Then it faded. Our writing techniques arent the same at all. Like Pinnacle has to really like, write his shit before he comes, he needs to crawl into the Pinnacle cavern and write in the dark, while me I just need a beat and a concept and Im gone, K Sleep fucking has to have the beat play for 3 and a half months, then he'll have a verse. LOL Im playing, but Im just more quick minded than the others. Nothing wrong with that, when we're together we're unstoppable. So its not like Illprint is dead, cuz itll never be dead.

Then I got myself into another rap beef, much to the dismay of the few other MC's I look up to (Manish Law and XV). They feel Im bigger than my competition, so why waste my time? And I try to formulate an answer, but I really dont have one. Its just fun for me. Its easy work. Like most of my foes are not even on the level I am lyrically or creatively, they make LCD rap (lowest common denominator rap). Mike Game though, is clearly on an higher echleon of this rap shit. I encompass everything. Ive showed I can lean and swang over southern stylings, step up my raw lyrical ability on head ripping bangers, bare my soul over tracks bout the most common human emotion (pain). These niggas out here, can only smoke weed, party, and sell nonexistant drugs. That shits so played out b. And most of my foes are barely legal. And it fucks me up, I lose hope for the next generation of Wichita rappers. Then someone like a Yung Zone comes to me, and hes fucking 18, and is shredding it, but is fucking lost as to where he wants to go. Hopefully I can point him in the right direction, Id hate to see him fall into some LCD shit. And what bothers me the most, is that I dont even wanna do the shit that Im even somewhat known for. I dont like the womanizing music, ie "bitch placing" music (cuz it puts a bitch in her place, lol). Like the Cant Have What You Like, Bust Yo Face shit. Like its cool and aint no one really talking like that. But its like people laugh at it, and kinda forget where I started. Like people forget I only rapped to soul samples, and every song was a page out of my life. Now if I drop a "Perfect Present Tense" or a "Foolish Games" all I hear is "I AINT KNOW MIKE CAN RAP LIKE THAT". Theres more sides to me, like "Perfect Present Tense" took me days to perfect (no pun intended). Shit like "Worse I Ever Had" "Every Girl" "Cant Have What You Like" "Bust Yo Face" was all done in the span of like an hour at most.

Where was I going with this?

Aw yes, I am going to prolly finally give this shit up, at least until I feel the game needs me again. I planned on "Your Moms Favorite" to me hiatus leading joint, but I will instead put out "Final Solution", the final part of the "Reckless Trilogy". This will be an EP, and will be a very serious project. So watch for it, its coming.

Girls: What I've Learned

Again my friends, its the pivotal point in Mike Guesbys life where another girl has exited his life, and another oppertunity for self reflection has entered. Now me and this girl, well, to be honest, was destined to fail from the beginning. Started off right when me and my ex (the Notorious K.A.I. aka Kieristen "The Hammer" Holden aka the muse for Before I Embarass Myself) had ended. From jump, new girl blew the door off infidelity. Now, the ex, she had her far share of dirty, but this girl, man. Less than a month into it she starts cheating, then gets herself in some sort of group sex incident that she labeled "rape". Yeah, you were raped, and at nights a walk the streets of Wichita in a mask a cap and multiple gadgets looking for my parents killers. I tried people, to do my best. But hey it was my fault for not letting the girl go from jump, I know, Im a sucker for love, and always find myself attached to the wrong type of girls. Theyre all dirty girls, so like my mentor Rob Dyrdek would say, Im DGL (Dirty Girls 4 Life). I dont know why, and I dont know how I keep attracting these girls. Its kinda like I like this shit. I know, Mike's theories come back to slap him in his unshaven face. Ive had this long standing theory that girls only like bad guys, which is why youll continuely run into bitches with trust issues and the likes, because theyre last boyfriend (or in more realistic cases, last guy they slept with), was a fucking sack. And in my case, each of my last girlfriends, were either hoo-ers or exhibited hoo-er like behavior. Each time, Im like "Fuck that, that wont be happening" and Kortez will be like "Yeah, right, of course it wont", then it will, then Ill be like "Fuuuuck!!".

Now, to what Ive learned.

Ive learned that with dealing with female sex, theres no right way to handle them. Everything is wrong. Whatever you thought you knew, you dont. Sometimes it works out, most times it doesnt. Like with this last girl, I had been super sweet n all that gay shit with my exes, and yet those bitches ran away to first guy who was semi attractive but treated them terribly. So I figured, fuck that shit, Ima be a fucking a douche now. And what happens? Well the bitch ran off to anyone trying to fuck. Maybe had i been nicer, shed at least have the decency to sleep with someone who wasnt ugly as all fuck. Ive also learned that all girls are the same. Us guys have this theory that pretty girls are the worst when it comes to relationships. Sure theyre great to fuck and are extremely easy on the eyes, but will more than likely cheat on you for they feel they are better than you. So I step down to the alright looking girl, and she turned out to be the worst of them all.

What I do have to my advantage, is a distinct sense of deception, meaning, I can pretty much tell when youre lying to me. Like the last girl, last few weeks, shes conviently either had to work late, or leave her phone at home, or go swimming at 9 pm when its 70 degrees out and looks like itll rain. Ill call, and when shed call back, 30 minutes or so later, she "didnt feel her phone ring", which I took to mean, "Hey Im sorry I was sucking some dick and couldnt answer, but whats up".

Suffice it to say, I have next to no trust in the female sex, and by next to, I mean absolutely none. And if I had higher self esteem, then Id prolly be better off. But face it, I dont make alot of money, dont look that good, has a small penis, and cant really perform well sexually, thus I have nothing to offer a lady. I do though, have a penchant for shit talking and making you feel less than me, so I got that going for me.

Now will I give up on girls? No, prolly not, but I do know that from here on out, dont expect anything more from me thant a few laughs and the occassional act of sexual indecency.

Cant Have Shit That You Liiiike, NOOOOOO

For your listening pleasure I bring you "Cant Have Shit That You Like" by Mike Game ft. K Sleep from the 2008 mixtape "Reckless Abandon"
"Cant Have Shit That You Like" : http://www.zshare.net/audio/60687349e94d0875/

Now for the topic at hand, a females sense of entitlement.

So Im talking to a friend of mine, and Im going on and on about how I cant stand a person with no job and shit. They mentioned they dont have a job, which I knew, but it doesnt really matter until it affects me. They wanted an example, so I said that Ill date a bitch with no job, fuck a bitch with no job, you know until it affects me. As in wanted to go eat all the time, and the bitch aint got no money. Wants to go to the movies or some shit, aint got no money. When a bitch wants to live of my funds. FUCK....THAT!!!

Ive noticed that in this 2009 day and era we live in, bitches have this fucked up entitlement issue. They feel they need all this because they have a vagina. Mind you, vaginas are susceptible to various infections and bleed once a month, something, I wont lie to you, I wouldnt want for myself. Sure, guys are interested in vaginas, but most would rather take a mouth. Now, someone will say some shit to the contrary, which would be wrong of them. Its a known fact that the only power women hold over men is the vajayjay. Because in relationships, women look at men as the protector the provider and as a sexual device. Women love sex just as much as men, men just arent sex nazis ie "Oh yeah bitch, NO DICK FOR YOU!!!" then the bitch gets on some act right. No, I guy can come home and find out his bitch maxed out the credit card on some dumb shit but will still muster the strength to fuck. A guy goes to a poker game with the fellas and that vaj is off the table for at least a month (or in my case, you take ya cd to a club during off business hours to try and book a show, bitch hears "i was at the club" and that vaj goes in hiding for 3 months)

But this isnt really about sex. Its about women feeling the need to have shit handed to them, getting whatever they want. Phonte was tweeting bout it the other day, about how he opened a door for an elderly woman and some young broad was lookin at him like he should get her door too, and he looked at her like "yeah right bitch". See, women got this independent spoiled shit going for them. They talk all that independent shit, but yet want a nigga to do something for them. And I dont get it. Ive been in a few relationships and I can tell you what I got vs what they got me. Ex #1 She got some animals flowers you know dinner dates (mind you im 17), what did I get? NOTHING
Ex #2 Got a itallian charm bracelet, a diamond ring, flowers, songs written and recorded for her. What did I get? A turned down KState scholarship, a broken heart, being cheated on twice. Ex #3 Got 2 diamond rings, a house, a car, half my army pay checks, countless sweet gifts and gestures. What did I get? An eviction, a past due electric bill, cheated on many times, a crushed shattered heart, and the possible abortion of my child. Now you see why bitches cant have shit? Cuz they want shit, but dont deserve shit. But yet, I still find myself treading dangerously close to making the same mistakes over and over again. I DO HAVE A SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT, every girl Ive dated, Ive been the best man I could be for them. I was nice sweet charming faithful all that. And never got nothing but a "Fuck you Mike".

So ladies, if you like Mike, and want to be with Mike just know a few a things
1)I will not treat you to anything
2) All dates will be halfsies (ie i pay for me you pay for you)
3) See something you want me to buy, well then start saving your pennies
4) YOU CAN NOT, AND WILL NOT, HAVE SHIT THAT YOU WANT LOVE NEED AND/OR LIKE

Charles Hamilton, Not Only A Gaybo, But A Punk Bitch As Well

So after months of beef with this gaybo, nothing seemed to be working on this guy. He continued to make shitty music, but would comment on my blogs, comment on my video, and post my videos on his blog, as if to talk down on me. As an MC, Im far superior, my cousin just so happens to be a drunk who works at the post office, his cousin, MC Lyte. Unfortunately for him though, even though hes on Interscope, Im sure that not only will my album drop before his, Itll prolly sell more too. But Im going to take some time to tell as to why not only am I the better MC, but also the better man.

"Dont roll bitches with kids its hard to control them
All up in my face, Ill hit the bitch with a stroller"
-"Them Hoes Like"

"Bust my windows Ima bust yo face bitch
Blood in ya grill, make ya fa real taste it"
-"Bust Yo Face"

"And naw, you aint ever had a man like that
Soon as you grab something make you put it right back, yeah"
-"Cant Have Shit"

"Busted too fast, the bitch wanted to laugh
So I left her eye black after I hit her with a shot glass"
-"Twisted"

As you can see, Mike Game has, and always be firm on putting his shoe on a woman, puttin a bitch in her place, controllin his hoes.

2 DV Charges
1 Assault
1 Assualt L.E.O. (law enforcement officer)
1 Battery L.E.O.

Mike Game is all about beating people the fuck up.
Charles Hamilton is all about getting beat the fuck up.

I now know his inspiration for "Tears Of Fire"

And Im 100% positive that Brooklyn Girls was inspired after he talked slick to some Lil Kim lookin Foxy Brown voiced Brooklyn Girl, who then beat him the fuck down. So he wrote a song about how special they are, lest he gets beat up again.

Now I know that if I were to encounter Charles Hamilton in the streets, you know as I step over him on skid row, I can punch him in the face and nothing will happen. I can see it now

::Mike walking down 147th n Lennox::
Charles: ::extends Interscope logo coffee mug:: Change? Change?
Mike: Yo Charles, whats up gaybo?
Charles: ::extends Interscope logo coffee mug:: Change? Change?
Mike: Naw son, I only roll that Intrust Bank Black Card
Charles: ::extends Interscope logo coffee mug:: Change? Change?
Mike: Dude, I just told you that I didnt have any
Charles: ::extends Interscope logo coffee mug:: Change? Change?
Mike: ::places nothing in mug:: There ya go fellow
Charles: ::puzzled disappointed look on his face:: Chaaange?
Mike: No, thats hope. Now dont use it all at once
Charles: ::extends Interscope logo coffee mug:: Change? Change?
Mike: ::punches Charles Hamilton dead in the face:: Change that muthafucka
Charles: ::sprawled out on pavement:: ::gasps:: Change ::gasps::
Mike: Change careers vato, haha, I said vato. ITs Illprint, Bitch

And They Say Keep It Real?!?!?!

"They talking all this keep it keep it real, man keep it real dont pay the muthafuckin bills" - Young Chris "1800Hustler"

So its getting a little too real in the streets of hip hop. Ok, its really not. But now, I can lie about some shit, then admit it, then yal will still love me. Well, pending I was an err "influential" mainstream big time rapper. Its crazy all this new "real" talk is coming on the heels of a blog I posted over on ICThipop about my fellow local rappers not keeping it real in their songs. In the case I was mentioning is that, the rappers out here work at McDonalds and shit, then get on the songs and shit rapping that they slangin drugs and shit. Which I know not to be true. But it was out of line for me to say such, seeing how 50 Cent and Clipse have been slanging crack now years after their record deals and acquired legal wealth. Is it ok for the major labels to push the lies their artists feed us down our throats and not ok for MC Joe Schmoe from 9th and Grove to do the same?

Honestly, I dont think its right for anyone to give us these lies. But at the same time, its entertainment, and Im sorry, if 50 cent started rapping about his meetings and corporate mergers and his budget and shit, I would not care. But when he does shit like "Officer Down" and "Heat" Im all in. But the thing is, I dont know 50 Cent like that. But I know these guys like that. Im sorry, but if were from the same place, and you arent living like you are on television (thanks Lloyd Banks) (and by television I mean myspace). But we got Rick Ross lying forever about being a C.O. then he finally was like "Yeah, thats me, I made a bad decision". Since when has getting a state job and making an honest living a bad decision? Im pretty selling drugs is a bad decision, one of the worst you can make for financial gain. For some reason, Ive always respected the jacker more than the dealer. Mainly cuz if I get ran up on and my pockets ran, Im out the $4.86 and CD Tradepost All Access Card, but the dealer is poisoning people for the long term. A robbery victims life is ruined only for the time being and based on how much they had on them, but the addicts life is ruined until they die. One day at a time, you can be sober for 20 years, then you walk into a party and see some lines on the table, you get offered, you tell yourself "Shit its been 20 years, Im sure I can have a taste". Then next thing you know you lose everything, youre back on skid row turning tricks for a hit.

I love music with stories. Like the new Good Charolette Cd is full of stories, most of rock is. My favorite song of all time in the rock genre is the Metallica cover of Bob Segers "Turn The Page". The picture of life on the road is painted so vividly, you feel like youre with them. Aint nothing wrong with the drug talk as long as its in story form. Like Ghostface Killah & Raekwon have been talking bout coke for the longest, but the stories are so ill. Even UGK's "Pocket Full O Stones" is a story, Pimp C tells you how he got in when he says "I got my first ki, from my baby mamas brother". But I honestly feel that has a rapper, youve got 2-3 albums talking about that drug shit. First album, cool you can do that, you just left the streets, its new to you. 2nd n 3rd album, you still got some stories to tell. But muthafucka after you been out the streets for 15 years (like Jay-Z), you need to stop talking about that shit. I honestly dont understand the infatuation with the street naratives still. I mean fuck. Most of the people buying your music arent living that lifestyle. Its ridiculous as fuck right now. And its crazy how Ill overlook blatant lies of a fabeled drug dealer, but Ill love some violence. And quite frankly, thats from the movies I watch. Plus when I get off of work, and these poor fucks who sell me shitty dvds piss me off. Do I wanna go home and listen to a muthafucka talk about his rims and shit? No, I wanna listen to people getting got. Cuz I felt like killing a person or two.